Is work more important than our marriage?

Nowadays, it is common for the two spouses to work, and most of the time they spend more time at work than together at home. We live in a demanding society that puts pressure on the spouses: education for our children, the load from the companies we work for, the desire of having more, etc…

In fact, we spend at least one third of our day at work. Our co-workers sometimes become our confidents, and there is more communication with them than with our spouses. Little by little our chats with our spouses are shorter and shorter, and sometimes we even feel more comfortable with our co-workers than with our spouses. The lack of dialogue with our spouses will eventually take its toll. All of a sudden small problems or differences that could have been easily solved by sitting down and talking it out become major problems. We start complaining that our spouses don’t understand us. Attitudes of pride become the norm, and words that we didn’t want or didn’t mean to say slip through our lips. Little by little we are fertilizing the soil that will produce the fruit of our divorce.

The scenario described above is quite common in our places of work. Our lack of spiritual maturity makes us easy prey of unscrupulous people who will try to become the answer to our problems. Some will want to provide a shoulder for us to cry on, but usually they have hidden intentions. Others will give the wrong advice due to their own ignorance or hidden agendas. They’re not happy, so they don’t want others to be happy either. Sometimes these kind of people even helps create the problems we have at home. I have seen 10, 20, 30 years old marriages come to an end for silly reasons, but more often than not, it’s because of an affair. It is unfortunate but most of us in the heat of a moment will give up the most for the least. I have met people who will stop at nothing to get what they want. They will destroy families, and they will leave small children without a parent. Some of the affected people, the more passionate ones, will even turn to deadly solutions. I have read of horrendous crimes committed by people who were betrayed by their spouses.

The media plays an important role influencing the behavior of people. We see movies, TV shows, songs, articles, magazines, and books that are constantly feeding our senses with the wrong message. They praise, justify and even motivate people to do the wrong things. We are living in a society where all the wrong things are normal and good. Even more, having an affair in many circles has become part of their status. And, while some stand on solid principles, and say no to the excesses of modern society, they become everyone’s byword, and they sharpen their eyes against them.

Companies, also, have to be blamed. Their demands on their employees’ time is beyond reason. Company owners, CEOs, and managers simply don’t care - it is not of their concern what happens in their employees’ lives. All that is important is their bottom line - by far, in comparison to other generations, I would venture to say this one is the most selfish. It seems that because of their obsession with today’s dollar, they are forgetting about tomorrow’s dollar. A society without healthy families won’t produce consumers, which is what they want.

Last but not least is our own blindness, our lack of reasoning to distinguish right from wrong, and our flesh fragility to indulge in every desire that satisfies our senses. This keeps us from discerning the message of the media, and to raise our voice and demand more respect for us at work. We are willing to destroy our families, our children, our marriages and ourselves to have, in instead of to be.

It is time to wake up and not swallow everything that we are fed with. It is time to defend our marriages, our families, and our society. We need to open our eyes because we are losing our children to drugs and all kind of vices. We are bringing up an interiorly sick society, and we are being uprooted of important values, because we are being taught that having is more important than being. We need to spend time with our spouses and with our children. We can never stop our dialogue with them. If both spouses don’t need to work they shouldn’t. We’re in desperate need to respect our relationships and our commitments with those we have married and the children we have procreated.